Hi, kids. It’s time for Cool School Story Time.
Are you ready?
Um, I said are you ready??
Okay then! Today’s story is...
So, once upon a time a little girl named Goldilocks….
KIDS: Wait!
Oh yes.
Ah... That’s better.
So, a little girl named--
I get it.
Goldilocks.
a little girl named Goldilocks—that’s me—
was walking by a really SCARY swamp!
KIDS: No!!!
Oh, too scary?
KIDS: Yeah!
Sorry.
KIDS: Yay!!!
There!
So...
I was walking through a sunny meadow
filled with puppies
and flowers.
Aaaw! So cute!
And I happened upon a house.
Well... I was getting kinda hungry,
so I decided to stop and see if they had any snacks.
Helloooo??
[whispering] No one answered,
so I just went in.
Lucky me, there were some snacks on the table.
3 whole bowls of broccoli!
Oh...
No broccoli?
Okay...
I meant there were...
3 whole pizza pies!
Better?
Okay, so I started to eat some from the biggest pizza,
but it was a meat lover’s supreme or something.
It had pepperoni,
sausages,
hamburger,
anchovies,
mushrooms,
garlic,
and onions.
Yuck!!
Do YOU like garlic and onions?
Me either!
So I moved on the the next pizza...
It was weird.
No cheese at all,
it just had a bunch of vegetables on it.
Come on! It’s pizza!!
Do you want an ALL VEGETABLE PIZZA WITH NO CHEESE???
Yeah, there’s a time and a place for vegetables, right?
Like on your brothers plate.
KIDS: Ah ha ha ha ha!
So, I moved on to the smallest pizza,
and boy oh boy, it was JUST RIGHT!
Just the right amount of cheese,
a few pepperonis,
and a dipping sauce for the crust.
Delicious.
I ate it all up!
KIDS: Yeah!!
Then I felt like watching some TV.
They had some stuff Tivo’ed so I checked it out.
The first show they had saved was a National Geographic special on grizzly bears.
KIDS: Aaaahhh!!
Too scary!
So I tried the next selection,
but it was some a show about catching fish...
kinda boring...
So I tried the last show they had Tivo’ed.
KIDS: Yaaay!
The Muppet Show!!!
They had all the shows with Fozzy Bear!
Just right!
[yawns]
Then I realized
I was really,
really sleepy.
I decided these nice folks probably wouldn’t mind if I just...
took a little nap.
I found a bedroom,
and there were 3 beds!
Oh, jeez, I had to make another decision!
So, I tried the biggest bed,
but I climbed up and it was like trying to sleep on a big rock!
That bed was not comfy!
I tried the middle one,
but it was like trying to take a nap on a bunch of cotton candy...
Too soft!
Well, I tried the little one,
and you’d think I’d have seen the pattern by now, but
boy oh boy... this is just right [yawns]
KIDS: Wake up! Wake up!
Bear!!
What?? Oh, yeah,
I woke up and there were THREE BEARS looking right at me!!!
KIDS: Run!!
No, kids, you don’t run from a bear!
You have to make yourself look HUGE so that they’re scared of you!
Roooooooooaaaaaaaaar!
Okay, second line of defense against a bear...
make ‘em laugh!
Bears love comedy.
So, what I like to do is find a funny video on YouTube.
Like the one,
Charlie Bit My Finger
Or the Dramatic Chipmunk
Or just any funny cat video.
Yeah, something like that!
And those bears
turned out to be really, really nice.
And we just sat around all afternoon watching funny videos, laughing, and eating ice cream and honey!
[sighs] So that’s the story of me, Goldilocks, and my new 3 best friends,
Bearry, Teddy and Gummy.
The End
KIDS: Yaaay!
That’s our story for today, kids.
Thanks for stopping by to see me,
and remember, any time you want to hear a story, just come visit me in the library!
And tell your parents to subscribe!
It’s that button right up there!
See ya!
KIDS: Bye!!!